A little background on 12:15 am. I wrote this at on April 29th of 2017 during one of my worst panic attacks of my life. This “poem” is just my thoughts during this event as it pertains to anxiety and panic attacks. It was tough because I was restless and anxious, so it was hard to stay still. I wrote half of it in my room and the other half outside in the darkness of the early morning. At the start, I was in full panic attack mode and I had just taken an Ativan. This panic attack required more than one Ativan that time. By the end, the panic attack iwore me out beyond compare.
Enjoy, and please Always Keep Fighting.
12:15 am by James Edgar Skye
It’s 12:15 in the morning.
My mind is racing and
I can feel my panic rising.
Shallow and slow, I can’t catch my breath.
Restlessness. A feeling of unease.
My hands start to tingle, numbness takes over.
I pace. Take a drink of water—
then begin to pace again.
I must stay inside, no— I can’t.
I must go outside.
My mind races faster, Will I run out of breath?
How do I control this feeling of helplessness?
I overthink. Please stop!
Then again, I over think. And again.
I lose control and the only way back,
is it this tiny white pill in my hand?
God, I want to sleep.
There is so much to do tomorrow.
Finally. I’m in control again.
Anxiety, why do you control me so?
It’s over for now.
Upgrading The Bipolar Writer Blog to Business
I am looking to expand The Bipolar Writer blog to new territories that include having the blog sell books for other artists (if I can make everything work). I am also looking to sell my own book here on my blog. I hate asking for donations but I have to do what I can.
Photo Credit:unsplash-logoTyson Dudley