By myloudbipolarwhispers Posted on

What’s Behind a Smile?

On a news report after the suicide of Kate Spade her friend said, “The Kate I knew always had a smile on her face.”

A smile can be an illusion.

A lot can be hidden behind the mask of a smile. A smile is not always what it appears to be. A smile is not always authentic. Unfortunately we cannot always trust the appearance of a smile.

Only the person wearing the smile knows the true reason for their smile.

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There are many reasons why I smile:

  1. I smile to hide my pain.
  2. I smile to disguise my anger.
  3. I smile when I am sad.
  4. I smile when I am happy.
  5. I smile because it makes me feel a little better.
  6. I smile when I am nervous.
  7. I smile when I don’t know what to say.
  8. I smile hoping my smile will remind my brain to be happy and feel happy.
  9. I smile to make other people happy.
  10. I smile to comfort other people.
  11. I smile because I love my children.
  12. I smile when something is funny.
  13. I smile when I feel peaceful and content.
  14. I smile to welcome you into my soul.

A lot is hidden behind a smile, but the eyes can never lie.

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You can never disguise your eyes completely. I wear make-up to make my eyes look pretty and try to disguise my pain, but pain is hidden in the eyes behind the smile. The eyes are the window to the soul and my soul holds the truth of all my secrets.

I have heard many people say after someone dies by suicide that when they looked at pictures of them they could see the pain. It was there. They say they should have looked closer. When we know what to look for and after we know the truth then it’s easy to see it. Hindsight is 20/20.

Robin Williams and the singer Chester Bennington of Linkin Park are two celebrities that died by suicide. Their sadness was visible if you looked closely into their eyes. If you look at pictures of Robin Williams or Chester Bennington from Linkin Park you can see the sadness in their eyes and in their face, especially if they are not hiding behind their smile masks.

Look closely into people’s eyes. You can see a lot in their eyes. The eyes are the windows to the soul and there is much beauty inside the windows of the soul.  The soul  holds our truth. The soul holds the blueprint of the person God intended us to be. We are still in there regardless of other masks we hide behind. The soul always lives behind the interference of pain, illness and trauma.

When you look at someone really look at them. See them. Look into their eyes and fully engage with them. Look closely into someone’s eyes so you can see how they are truly feeling and who they are. See and know their pain if and when it is there. See and feel their joy and love if and when it is there. Look into people’s eyes and get to know who they are.

Don’t settle for the masks of outer appearances. Dig deep and look deep into the heart and soul of people. There is much beauty and stories behind pain, mental illness, other illnesses, trauma, a bad day, heartache and so much more. Search for people’s true identity. Find their inner beauty. Everyone has it. God put it there. Sometimes we have to look deeper to find their beauty, but it is there. Be patient and I guarantee you will find it.

A person’s true beauty lies behind the eyes and lives within the soul.

~written by Susan Walz

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Copyright © 2018 Susan Walz | myloudbipolarwhispers.com | All Rights Reserved

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16 Replies to “What’s Behind a Smile?”

  1. cigarman501 says:

    “People say I’m the life of the party
    Because I tell a joke or two
    Although I might be laughing loud and hearty
    Deep inside I’m blue
    So take a good look at my face
    You’ll see my smile looks out of place”
    Smokey Robinson…”Tracks of my Tears.”
    Thanks for sharing!

    1. myloudbipolarwhispers says:

      Thank you for sharing the lyrics to that song. I always loved that song but never knew all the lyrics. I googled the video and rest of the lyrics. Beautiful lyrics and song. Whoever wrote the song got it right. Those are wonderful lyrics and they sang what I was trying to say. Thank you for sharing your insight about how this song relates to my post. I love that. Thanks for your great feedback. Hugs, Sue

  2. Chelsea says:

    What a great post, thank you so much for sharing. ❤️ I can see in pictures of myself, that’s there’s sadness in my eyes, even when smiling. Not always, but I can tell when it’s there. I’ve wondered if anyone else notices. What an insightful post. Thank you

  6. taurusingemini says:

    very informative pieces, and sometimes, we smile, because that is what’s expected of us, because we believed, that our negative emotions (i.e. anger, sadness, sorrows, etc., etc., etc.) won’t be accepted by those we know well, that is why, we covered ourselves us.

    1. myloudbipolarwhispers says:

      Very good feedback. I agree with you. I think you got it right. I think I smile because people always expect me to be happy and positive. I am a person that has always tried to make other people happy even when I am not. I smile a lot. We are taught that “good” people are happy and wear a smile… so we try to be “good” and smile even when we don’t feel like smiling sometimes. Thanks again. Hugs, Sue

  7. lynnetteok says:

    You are so right! Most people are satisfied with a smile and “I’m fine.” One of the things that drew me to my husband was that he always looked deeper. He’d say, “No you aren’t. What’s going on?”
    I think people just accept the smile because it’s easier than seeing or hearing the truth.

    1. myloudbipolarwhispers says:

      I agree with you. Sometimes people are afraid of the truth and if they hear the truth they don’t fully grasp it and hide that knowledge in their back pocket to deal with it later. Sometimes later never happens or later happens too late. I think many people are incapable of dealing with negative feedback and you are right they don’t want to hear it. They don’t really want to be bothered with it because they can’t handle their own problems or something. I am not sure. I always want to help people because I never want others to feel like I did or go through what I had to. I think that comes with having a mental illness and other life struggles… or something. Some people just aren’t as empathetic. I am not sure and am just thinking out loud as I type… lol. I am happy you found a good husband. He sounds like a very wise and understanding man. Thanks again for your great feedback. Have a happy, healthy and fabulous weekend. Hugs, Sue

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