the biggest lie
your eating disorder will ever tell you
is that you’re
almost there—
that there is a set point for your happiness,
which you will reach once you just
lose that three pounds
or
drop another two sizes
or
run an extra mile
and it distorts the truth so seductively,
so believably,
that you listen
and push your beautiful body
to limits it should never be forced to face
for the sake of obedience
and the hope of being
enough
as every day you lose more and more
not only of your skin
but of yourself
in a neverending search for satisfaction
that the voices will mask as
achievable
and
obtainable
and
the answer to all your problems
yet when you look in the mirror
you see only inadequacy
for no reason except that
you are lost in a struggle
to be better and better
until you are
the best
and anything below that is
weakness
and ultimately
failure
even though
you are straining toward an unattainable goal
and the
reality
is that
you are never more powerful
than when you choose to argue back
and simply say
no–
that you will not give in,
and that the mirror’s image shows
someone flawed,
but
real
who is
strong
and
whole
and a
fighter,
and the hardest part
ultimately becomes the easiest
when you simply
stop listening
to all the lies you have been fed
in place of the sustenance your flesh has longed for
and whisper to your beaten down reflection
the revelation you have been rejecting all along–
that you have always
been
enough.
This brought me to tears, it’s absolute heaven to the eyes of an anorexic. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
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this means more to me than i can possibly say. i’m so, so glad you were encouraged by this, and i applaud you, lovely, for fighting the battle xx
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Felt that, deep❤
Ty, spoke to me.
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i am so happy to hear that! thank you for reading, from the bottom of my heart 🙂 xx
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I’m not one for poetry. But, this was beautiful. I don’t have an eating disorder but my reflection doesn’t always agree with what my mind says about my body. Great post!!
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thank you so much! i’m so happy that you were happy to relate and receive something from this piece, even if your circumstances are different. i think we all struggle with body image, and must choose to believe we are lovely–i hope so much that you do 🙂 xx
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I was just asked this question by my dietician…when will you be enough? after we we were discussing the content you included in your post. It is so hard to to get there and reading this brings me to tears.
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i’m so glad you were able to raise a discussion based off of this post! i understand exactly what you’re going through, and to know that this is helping to fuel your recovery means so much to me. i hope you remember that you ARE enough, and always will be! ❤ xx
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“you have always been enough.” Never forget it!!
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thanks so much–and same to you! 😉 xx
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Nice peace dear. ❤️✌️
BY FOR NOW
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thank you so much, lovely! i always appreciate the support xx
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Your Welcome dear. ❤️✌️
BY FOR NOW
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Sounds like you’re actively coping with that distorted image of how your body looks, and it’s a good thing, because, realizing our tendencies is the first step to changing our behaviors, to healing our bodies and minds too…
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thank you so much for reading and commenting. i agree completely xx
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Beautiful and so true. Thank you for writing this and sharing it.
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thank YOU for reading! i’m so happy you enjoyed 🙂 xx
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So beautiful, passionate, and accurate!
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thank you so much! that means the world to me 🙂 xx
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I loved this so much!! Beautifully written. Thank you for sharing this!
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thank you so much for reading! it always encourages me to continue writing when i see comments like yours 🙂 xx
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