I’ve taken steps to cut stress from my life. My living situation was stressful, so I moved out into a one bedroom apartment. I worked a stressful job so I quit. I bounced around jobs for a few months before settling as a barista. I felt my life was simpler. Some days were still stressful. I still had panic attacks and some days I hated going to work. I didn’t understand what exactly was setting me off. Several things added to my stress triggers. I didn’t know where to begin to solve this issue. I started with what I could control.
I noticed when I was working, I kept my phone on silent. It vibrated every time I got a notification. While in a stressful moment at work, I would get several vibrations in my pocket at the same time. With too much stimulation; it made me angry adding more stress. I first turned off the vibration setting, but this only solved half the problem. I hate seeing the icons on apps indicating how many notifications I have. All the banners, buttons, and icons became overwhelming. I went through the settings of each app and turned off notifications. My phone fell quiet.
Text messages and phone calls are still on but not much else. If I want to check my notifications, I have to open the app. My stress levels have gone down. I’m not getting overstimulated. I still struggle in overcrowded social situations. I manage things better by controlling things I can control. I wish I could go back to the time when notifications made me happy. I felt connected and like others were thinking of me. Now notifications feel meaningless. They’re extra unwanted noise. I’m quieting everything in my life. This will help quiet my mind and the healing can continue.
I recommend disconnecting from the online world for a day now and then. Think of it as recharging your social battery. Go out into nature, read that book, write that story, explore a new place. The notifications never go away. I’m trying not to worry about clearing them anymore. I’ll get to them when I get to them. There’s no need to rush anything. Easier said than done. My mind is always racing. I want to slow down and be calm. I still have panic attacks, but they’re not caused by my phone anymore. I almost look forward to checking notifications again. Almost.Become a Patron!